Lost In Translation

I heard a muttered sound of my colleague's voice behind me.

"Phakay sack-sack phashentay khow."

I turned around. "Are you talking to me?" I said. I still can't comprehend what she just uttered.

"Phakay sack-sack phashentay khow." She repeated but this time she showed me two sets of blood culture bottles for her patient.

"Say that again?" I was quite impressed that she just spoke to me in tagalog but with an english accent.

I was laughing so hard after realizing what she just said. "You're good, aren't you?

"Who taught you that?" I asked her.

"Have I said it right then?" "So, did you understand that? She asked me back.

"My previous Filipino colleagues have taught me a few words but I can't remember some of it now"

"Right, I'm going to *stab your patient but I'm not sure whether I can find a vein coz he's so swollen." I told her. "But I'll try."

"Thanks!"

"Here you go." I've handed back to her the bottles that were already filled with the patient's samples. "I've not labelled it yet though"

"Oh, you're a star!"

"How do you say, "thank you lovey" in your language?" She asked me.

"Salamat, mahal." I said. "Salamat means thanks and mahal means love."

"Oh, I'll just say mahal. It's easier." "Thanks, mahal" she said.

"Pleasure." I replied.

So, how do you say: "Don't drink and drive or you'll end up in ICU with a smashed head and broken bones?" Another colleague asked me.

"Huwag kang tanga!" I said.

"That short?" he said, a bit impressed.

"Well, that means: Don't be stupid!" I replied.

"Ah, I see."

While on the background, I heard another colleague saying, "coffee, mahal?"

Lordy be! Fortunately, our patients are all sedated or else, they would've thought they're in another country :)
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I had a shift once with two other Filipino colleagues. Sometimes, it's fun to work with an all-filipino team but some of them aren't mindful of the fact that speaking in our own language can be rude.
An old lady, bless her, was uncomfortable in her bed and was shifting from one position to the other.

"Are you alright darling?" I asked her.

"I just can't make myself comfy," she said.

"Don't worry, we'll help you."

The three of us helped her (while talking in tagalog in between turns.)

"Thank you, ladies." She said.

"No worries."

"Excuse me love," she called me.

"Am I still in England?"

And that's when I sealed my lips.
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*Stab- is the British term for blood-taking.
And of course in tagalog it means: saksak